Why You Struggle to Focus on What Matters
Seek truth from facts and accept it
Recently, I asked a Chinese friend of mine, who is an experienced trader, about the key quality needed for success in trading. His quick response, in Chinese, was unexpected. Rather than citing typical traits such as intelligence or a knack for numbers, he highlighted a four-word Chinese phrase (实事求是), which translates to “seeking truth from facts and accepting it” — a concept that emphasises realism and pragmatism, based on facts instead of ideals or assumptions.
This made me think about why we often lose direction and struggle to focus on the right things. Andy Grove, the former CEO of Intel, once outlined two primary obstacles to effective work: not knowing how to do it, or lacking the motivation to do it well.
Similarly, I believe there are two main reasons we fail to focus correctly: either we don’t know what the right thing is, or we refuse to acknowledge and accept it as right, especially when it contradicts our expectations.
My Own Story
For instance, I am an avid runner with several marathons under my belt. My first marathon time was respectable at 4h26m, and I maintained a steady pace throughout. However, a marathon I ran in Espoo last year was particularly challenging. Despite achieving a personal best of 3h36m one year before that and lacking sufficient training, I ambitiously aimed to finish within 3h45m. Pushing myself to keep pace with the 3h45m group, I reached near my anaerobic threshold and eventually experienced muscle cramps at the 27km mark, leading to the dreaded “hitting the wall” at 30km. From there, the run was a mix of running, walking, resting, and stretching. I finished in 4h2m — not my worst time, but certainly my most difficult marathon.
Initially, I blamed external factors like the weather and inadequate hydration stations.
But the reality was that I had simply failed to concentrate on the right things. More accurately, I was reluctant to acknowledge and accept what was actually right.
I didn’t face the uncomfortable truth that my training was inadequate after setting a personal best the previous year.
I also couldn’t accept that breaking my personal best again wasn’t feasible.
Before the race, I wasn’t realistic about the 3h45 pacer being too ambitious for me.
Even during the race, when I noticed my heart rate was too high, I missed the opportunity to be pragmatic and reduce my pace.
All of these “unwillingness” led to an exceptionally difficult marathon experience, which could have been entirely avoided.
Three Mindsets to Start Focusing on the Right Things
Accepting hard truths that you hate to accept can be challenging, but here are three mindsets that help me focus on what's important:
- Accept and welcome all emotions, whether they are joyful or sorrowful. They are simply emotions. This is the basic foundation for being true to yourself. Treat all feelings equally and without judgement. Then, you won’t find yourself trying to dodge the so-called ‘bad’ or ‘negative’ emotions. Realizing you’ve regressed can bring sadness, but once you accept this sadness as just one of many emotions, you’ll be able to move forward and adjust your expectations accordingly.
- Suggest, Don’t Decide: When emotions might cloud your judgment, hold off on immediate decisions. Instead, offer yourself advice as if you were a friend to yourself. This less subjective stance can lead to more fact-based and objective choices.
- Still Trust Your Choices: I used to struggle with sleep before marathons until I read (without verifying the source) that lack of sleep doesn’t impact performance. This belief helped me rest easy. The fear of choosing incorrectly can be paralysing, but sometimes, any decision might lead to a similar outcome. So don’t fear decision-making. Just as with my tough marathon experience, you’ll manage, and finishing is an achievement in itself.
By adopting a mindset that values realistic self-assessment, open-mindedness, and trust in our own decisions, we can navigate through life’s marathons more effectively. Whether in trading, running, or any other aspect of life, the key lies in seeking truth from facts and accepting them. This approach not only enhances our personal growth but also ensures we make progress in the most meaningful and fulfilling ways.
